人雖腦殘，志比金堅

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My grandma would write her entire message in the subject line and then in the body of the email she'd write, "see above."

我奶奶會把所有的信息寫在標(biāo)題欄，然后在正文部分寫——“往上看”。

subject n. 主題

body n. 正文

"Sorry sir, I can't come into work today; I'm in bed with a nasty clown." I meant to say "cold."

“老板，恐怕我今天不能來工作了，我現(xiàn)在和一個流氓小丑一起躺在被子里?！蔽移鋵嵪胝f，“我感冒了?！?

nasty adj.下流的

clown n. 小丑

On a business trip I tried to message my wife"Tell the kids I love them."It autocorrected to "Tell the kids I love men."

有一次出差，我想要給老婆發(fā)短信說：“告訴孩子們，爸比愛他們?！苯Y(jié)果系統(tǒng)自動糾錯成“告訴孩子們，老子愛男人?！?

autocorrect v. 自動糾正

I secretly liked my friend's boyfriend. He sent me a birthday e-card. I opened it 36 times. It notified him each time.

我暗戀著我一個朋友的男朋友。一天，他發(fā)了一張電子的生日賀卡給我。我打開了36次，重點(diǎn)是，每一次他都會收到提醒信息。

e-card 電子卡片

notify v. 通知

Emailed my boss, Stuart, and it autocorrected to, "Thanks, I’ll take care of it tomorrow, stupid."

給我上司斯圖爾特先生發(fā)郵件，系統(tǒng)自動糾錯，“好的，我明天會來處理的，你個笨蛋！”

Stuart 人名，斯圖爾特

Stupid n. 笨蛋

My co-worker sent an email to everyone asking for his help to get his wife turned on. He meant to say "Wi-Fi."

我同事給所有人群發(fā)郵件，請求大家?guī)兔?，把他老婆給打開。他其實是想說“把Wi-Fi給我開了?！?

turn on 打開